Ping Pong Politics

 

I’ve  sat in the neutral zone listening to countless political rants for many years; now it’s my turn, so please hear me out. Also please note my personal political rant has little to do with actual politics and a whole lot more to do with human decency or to be more specific, the lack thereof.  

This babbling comes after many months, if not years, of watching both sides lob their opinions back and forth, like opposing sides engaged in what seems like the world’s most horrific Ping-Pong match, played with words that hit like grenades rather than friendly teammates. 

Back and forth my head has shook from side to side trying to follow the backhand, wracking my brain trying to figure out what each participant thought they were accomplishing with this aggressive way of playing. As quietly as possible I’ve sat on the sidelines wondering if there would be anyone left standing with their integrity in tact in the end. 

While I never want to live in a world where people feel the need to censor themselves, I also desperately seek a reality in which those speaking incessantly with no regard to who they are offending are thoughtful and self aware enough to know when they’re approach is silencing their message all together. There seems to be less and less awareness these days and perhaps that’s my intent with this rant, or maybe I’m just bitching about all the bitching I keep hearing, either way the irony of me ranting about something I’m sick of hearing about is not lost on me.  

With all of these observations and cranky context considered, it boils down to this, I’ve started to believe that for every salacious and sweeping post on social media platforms demonizing the “other side” there are ten people in the middle of the match caught in the crossfire. 

Families, communities, friends, neighborhoods all divided simply because they forgot how to communicate. I feel like everywhere I turn there are two sides to every argument, the idiot and the ignorant. I can’t help but look around and see people so ill equipped for constructive confrontation they cannot even have a conversation. 

I’ve tried to put a spin on it, give grace wherever I can, empathize with everyone, and look for the humanity behind the lack of humility being spewed everywhere, but that approach only works to an extent.  We are so far beyond that point it’s ludicrous and I'm done to the point of coming undone! 

At some point being well mannered and in the middle starts to feel inconsequential and insignificant. I started to question myself which is crazy to consider, considering no one seems to filter what they say these days and if those of us who did had a voice we’d use it to remind you - you can be much more influential beside someone than you can shouting at them from the other side. 

We are in a time when I think the world needs people to model decency louder and clearer than ever before and not just to our social media friend who’s likely a grown ass person who’s mind you will not change, but to our CHILDREN that we are shaping and modeling life for in every way!

For the next generation who you should want to be able to think freely for so many reasons 

I beg of you these things: 

- STOP making everything about you

- STOP thinking everyone is out to start something or offend you

- STOP thinking a conversation cannot be had without opening a can of worms

- STOP deducing another’s party affiliation based on your perception of them not actually getting to know them

- STOP thinking everyone you know is a diluted single issue voter

- STOP being careless with your words 

*here’s a bonus tip, if you wouldn’t say it to your child don’t say it on social media

- STOP name-calling, belittling, bashing, and condemning one another

- STOP polarizing people

If you really want this nation to be a democracy, representative of all:

- REALIZE that our system is man made and so therefor FLAWED AF, you must put your faith somewhere else

- REALIZE in and of itself it is designed in a way that backs you and everyone else into a corner, people must be this or that, that limits free thinking by it’s very nature and that alone has consequences we should all pay attention to

- REALIZE no one person or social group has ever grown by aligning 100% with one another, we are meant to differ and that’s NEVER a negative, give that the space it deserves

- REALIZE every system that’s ever existed has been said to have “cracks kids fall through,” and now the divide is wide enough that all of our children are falling into an abyss; we all have had a part in that, we should be ashamed and looking for ways to make that right, not for another injustice to argue over

- REALIZE church and state were divided out a long time ago and for good reason, stop lumping everyone you know into this or that box based on their beliefs

- REALIZE that if you are a Conservative shaming someone for their opposing vote you are about as affective as a crazy self-proclaimed “Christian” screaming at strangers from a street corner about how they are going to hell; no one is going to want to follow your brand of leadership or even worse - your God 

- REALIZE that if you are a Liberal shaming someone for their opposing vote you are about as inclusive as the KKK; and your hypocrisy is felt more than your love will ever be

Everyone talks about how things need to change, yet offers up little concessions of their own. As the world becomes more personalized and we are able to choose our news affiliates, whom we will follow and not follow, whom we will be “friends” with or cut out of our lives, not only does our newsfeed narrow; so does our view of the world and just how little our opinion matters loses focus entirely. 

Yet we seem willing to trade that false sense of ________ (you should do the soul searching necessary to fill in the blank here) for the relationships given to us, children’s lives entrusted to us, and social responsibilities that benefit us all. 

It makes zero sense to me!

When I stop too long to think about the dichotomy of it all is when I start shaking my head for a whole different reason. That’s when I have felt like begging you all still engaging in ostracizing one another to STOP! Only this hasn’t felt like the platform to do it, I’ve always thought respectful conversations were not possible on a social media platform but recently I asked a political question and had nothing but insightful responses and realized these conversations can be had they just need to be nurtured like ANY OTHER EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION. 

I encourage you all to try and channel your energy into this:

- START creating safe spaces for people to share 

- START respecting another’s opinions

- START modeling how to appropriately disagree 

- START looking for ways to build one another up not tear each other down

- START asking questions and actually listening

Maybe I’m naïve but I have never thought to put as much energy in to who is elected as much as how I acted. I have never thought we’d change the system from the top down and only then start engaging appropriately but rather that we’d create meaningful change by thoughtfully engaging in society first and empowering ourselves from the bottom up. 

I could be completely wrong, **** (another hint, this is the way to approach most loaded conversations) but what we are currently doing as a society clearly isn’t working and that lack of personal peace I see in those around me speaks volumes as to the damage this approach is causing. So what is there to lose in trying something different? 

No matter the intent when people entered this season we are in, there is no longer an admirable end goal in sight for those still arguing. Winning each round is no longer about getting your point across to affect change, you are back to the table at this point, either left talking to already like-minded people that don't need to hear you or you are simply polarizing those left near you that still differ in opinion solidifying their place holding with every rant. 

So if you’re still at it with aggression I think you need to ask yourself, are you now in it for no other reason than to obliterate and shame the opponent, reaffirm yourself, and go on to live another day feeling slightly more secure and in control than before? If that's the case, what are you so afraid of that you need to keep grasping at this false sense of control?  

No matter your answer, I promise you are losing more than you are gaining with each interaction. Whether it simply be personal peace or more ,this match is over, let it go.

A respectful game draws a crowd, watching cowards and bullies scream losses an audience, and with that audience goes any justification for continuing. 

Why are you forfeiting peace and the potential to positively influence others for a perverted, empty sense of righteousness? 

The only IMPRESSIONABLE ones still left watching are the captive audiences of future generations and they deserve so much more.